Birthdays and Stuff

My sis had her baby on Thursday. He's a cutie - at least from the picture on Anchorage Regional Hospital's baby page. Can't wait to meet him.

Saw Scott & Trouble when they were over this way on Friday... Took them to an old karaoke haunt. It was fun, but who did we run into?? John... the guy I was seeing last summer. He was sucking face with some chick with bunny ears (costume party). After a brief conversation, he kept his distance for the most part. But of course, as always happens when he runs into me somewhere, he called me a couple days later saying that he hasn't been able to stop thinking about me since he saw me. He misses me, remembers what a good thing he had, wanted to know if he could take me to breakfast, even asked what I wanted for my birthday, etc... It irritates me really. I want to be wanted, needed, loved. I want to be missed. But I want someone to realize what they have when they actually have me! Not after it's over and I've moved on. I know I've complained about this before and not to beat a dead horse, but when will men be satisfied with what is right in front of them?

I'm feeling rather melancholy today and I hate that. I don't know where this loneliness is coming from. I spent the last few days with Ken and it's been great. But today - well, this evening anyway - I just feel lonely and sad and bored. Stoooopid! I guess tomorrow I babysit for an hour or so (which will probably turn into a couple hours) and then Thursday, Ken is taking me to dinner for my birthday. And then I have no idea what I'm doing for the 3 day weekend. I'm a little sad that Ken has to work - I was really hoping to go to Leavenworth or something. I would love to go camping, but I'm just not up for doing it alone this time.

So, speaking of my birthday, I've had a lot of emails from friends wondering what's the birthday plan. I've never really been one to plan my own party. Guess if I want to see my friends, I'll have to though. I do love my birthday, but something tells me this one will be quiet and uneventful. Guess that's part of being in a relationship with someone who is an introvert and doesn't know many of my friends yet.

Ken's birthday is June 3rd. Trying to plan something for him, but it's not easy. I have been thinking that he just hasn't introduced me to a lot of his friends, but turns out, I know most of them. I asked him who his 5 closest friends were yesterday and he could only name 4... and 2 of them he hardly talks to or sees. I wanted to plan a surprise party, but it looks like I'll have to settle for just a small get-together at a mutual friend's house the weekend after his b-day. I bought him tickets to the Nickleback concert at the Gorge in August. Hope he is happy with the gift. He has been complaining that he has no idea what to get me. For someone who is usually observant and a very intent listener, he hasn't picked up on a single hint that I've dropped to try to make it easier for him. Men!

I love how quickly music can turn my mood around. I have so much negativity right now but I'm already starting to feel better. Maybe it's time to sign off and turn up the music!